Sebastian Snail Sr.

Edward Swan

Santa

Jimmy

Edward

Superintendent Thayer

Ray

Major Alistair Gregorys

Alfred Rott

Tom

Peter Riordan

Rob (uncredited)

L.S. Lowry

Clifford Cullen

Nigel

Chief Bobnar (voice)

Charlie Glover

Carmody Braque

Bill

Ian Paisley

Stanley/Stanley's Father/Stanley's Mother/Tony Hancock/Peter Sellers aka Dr Boob/George Formby/James Finlayson/Max Wall/Alistair Sim/Margaret Rutherford/Frank Randle/Max Miller/Noel Coward/Igor

David Irving

Joseph

Bayard Hamar / Bloodhound (voice)

Fungus

Self / Nick

Laurie Lee (voice)

The Professor

Arm Wrestling Man #2

Self

JMW Turner

Jerry

Himself

Dragon (voice)

Sid

Mark

Bob Boruchowitz

D I West

Dr. Kahn

Charlie

Mr. Lambert

Lennie Rubin

Peter Pettigrew

Arthur

Winston Churchill

Peter Pettigrew

Churchill (voice)

George Morgan

Bayard Hamar / Bloodhound (voice)

Georgie Godwin

Boggis

Terry Donaldson

Doug Becket

Peter Pettigrew

Peter Taylor

Phil Olson

Beadle

Nathaniel

Mr Emerson

Sugarman

Peter Pettigrew (uncredited)

Bill Ainscow

Narrator

Albert Pierrepoint

Wormtail

Malcolm Harvey

Terry Cannings

Mr. Poe

Peter Pettigrew

Simon Graham

Darren Barrington

Quinty

Charles Cheeryble

Self

Phil

Dad (voice)

Thomas Tipp

Tommy Rag

Mats, Steel Dragon Road Manager

Cliff

Andy, Claire's husband

Cunningham

Nick (voice)

Gourville

Armado

B

Richard Temple (The Mikado)

Sterling

Inspector Healey

David "Beano" Baggot

Gordon

Salesman

Rosencrantz

Maurice Purley

Jimmy Beales

Derek

Wolfgang and Amadeus Mozart

Chico

Francis Meeks

Pig Robinson

Aubrey

Eric Lyle

Ramborde

Hodkins

Kawab / Tomb Robber (voice)

Peck

Igor

Reverend Milne

Lt. Trotter

Paul

Dr. Polidori

Lyndon Baines Jellicoe

Paulus

Parswell

Douglas

1st Constable

Gordon

Detective Sergeant Baxter

Andrei

Epikhodov

Stranger

Jim (uncredited)

Shorty

Projectionist

Wainwright